Typical of Americans with “ethnic” roots, I grew up eating foods that my grandmother had brought with her from Osturňa: palacinky, holúbky, pirohy, chrústiky, makovník. These were the comfort foods that nourished and delighted me as a child. Once in Slovakia, I discovered bryndzové halušky and then, in Osturňa, knes.
Now living full-time in Slovakia, one would think that I have mastered all the classic Slovak recipes and lovingly prepare them for my guests. But I don’t. Why? Because I find Slovak cuisine boring and unimaginative.
There, I said it. Now, before you start sending me vitriolic emails, please finish reading this post.
Slovak meals are heavy on pork products and root vegetables, served aside the requisite pickled cabbage. Always plenty of meat, there are seldom green vegetables and almost never a fresh green salad. Yes, bravčový rezeň is tasty. But there are a lot of foods out there to explore.
I wonder who purchases the eggplants other than me, since no one I know had ever tried it. Squash is inexpensive and plentiful in the fall. Yet, people don’t seem to prepare it. Besides frozen fish, it appears that seafood delicacies, such as shrimp and scallops, never came to Osturňa before my arrival. And while I appreciate a good steak now and then, meatless meals can be delicious and satisfying.
I don’t flatter myself a great cook, but a competent one who can prepare a tasty four-course meal for eight in less than two hours. I never follow one single recipe, but compare several similar ones, then pick and choose the techniques and ingredients to create my own recipe. At the penzión, we endeavor to offer our guests a wide selection of foods. Those who are kosher, lactose-intolerant, gluten-free, vegetarian, or vegan all present challenges that we readily accept with gusto.
Our meals can be best described as eclectic. While we do prepare standard American dishes, like corn chowder, Caesar salad, and eggplant parmesan, we also wow them with things like salmon Wellington, bœuf bourguignon, and almond-encrusted tuna steaks. The pork loin marinated in bourbon always gets compliments. The idea is to constantly surprise guests with simple but delicious foods never before tried.
Parenthetically, I had my own surprise last week while visiting friends in Dresden, Germany. Following a delicious vegan meal, dessert was a dairy-free chocolate mousse with whipped cream. But how? Research led me to the answer: aquafaba, the water leftover from cooking garbanzo beans. My staff and I spent an hour duplicating the mousse recipe, and it was wonderful.
Overall, I am satisfied with the quality and variety of fresh foods at Slovak supermarkets. My pantry is chock-full of ingredients that mystify my staff, who tend to organize products by shape rather than contents. Still, there are many ingredients that are difficult to obtain: cornstarch, cream of tartar, Stevia, saffron. And why is fresh asparagus in the spring as scarce as a virgin in a whorehouse?
So, if you come to Penzión Európa looking for a typical Slovak meal, you will be terribly disappointed. But if you are looking for something out of the ordinary, it is the place for you.